This is from www.shwyd.blogspot.com. it's an amazing website....
I DID NOT WRITE THIS! I ONLY FOUND IT. Just so's you all know
I knew I liked her before we'd even officially met. She'd held my broken heart together when I'd let it get crushed by my own hopes for a different relationship and somewhere during that time my affections began to shift. She was endlessly sweet and compassionate towards me when I needed her to be, always on my side when things went wrong (though I kept trying to tell her it was my fault, if anybody's), and she always knew how to make me smile. She picked on me constantly in one of those irritatingly lovable sort of ways and I loved her all the more for it.
It was kind of tragic, the day I realized I cared more for her than I should have ever let myself. It was the same situation she had helped me through months before, but now she was the reason I couldn't wait to wake up every day. I couldn't wait for the chime of my phone that signaled an incoming text message with her name in the 'from' portion and every time it came, I couldn't stop the corners of my mouth from turning up any more than I could keep my heart from skipping a beat. The only part of my day that surpassed that moment was when my phone would ring at the end of her school day and I kept her company on her drive home. We'd swap stories of our days and I'd listen as she talked about some car she'd just passed and it's qualifications for epic awesomeness. I'd chuckle at the ferocity of the road rage that could come from such an adorable person as she fumed about some idiot that simply didn't know how to drive. And I knew, I knew I was falling.
I kept it to myself for as long as I could, trying to avoid the broken heart that was sure to be inevitable at the end. I wasn't relationship material. I wasn't anybody's idea of their very own 'somebody'. But stuffing it away was suffocating me and she began to notice the change in my behavior. When asked, I couldn't lie. I told her. I told her about the way she made each day a good day just by being a part of it. I told her I was crushing. She said she already knew, assured me it wasn't going to change things. She wasn't going anywhere, and it made breathing easier.
I'll never forget the day I finally met her in an airport. My first glimpse had my heart tripping all over itself and I can't even begin to tell you the number of butterflies that just wouldn't settle. I'd seen pictures, of course, but pictures never do a person justice and nothing could prepare me for that amount of beautiful. Her smile, her eyes, her hair, her skin... everything about her. And I'll never forget that our first words face-to-face were that same teasing that she'd always displayed. She was who she'd always claimed to be and we fell into the same companionship we'd always shared. And still... I was falling.
Our time spent together wasn't nearly enough, but it's something I would never give up. And it wasn't everything I hoped it could have been, but I wouldn't trade it for anything. I'm home now and missing her every day. She was right... nothing changed. And I'm not quite sure what to feel about that. Because while I love what we have, there's more that I want.
I'm haunted by the way her hand felt in mind, small and soft and perfect. When I close my eyes I'm trapped by her eyes, her smile, her laugh. And when I concentrate hard enough I am blessed by the memory of an unsolicited hug that warmed me to my core. And at the end of every day that's blessed just because she's in it, I find myself forever wanting more...
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