Closure

Closure.

How do you find it?
What is it?

Is it being able to see his FB page and not stalking every new picture, looking for signs of him moving on?

Is is being able to think about him, the memories we have, and not feel like your heart is being ripped out?

Being able to look at all the pictures from the last 2 years of your life without breaking apart?

Not wonder what he's doing, How he's doing, if he's moving on?

Not hoping that he's as miserable as you are, but yet hoping he's doing ok?

We didn't even have a chance at closure.
Life was moving too fast.
Spinning us too far apart.
I didn't even have time to realize what I'd lost.


But now.
Now, all I have is time.
Time to think.
Thinking is something I do too much.

I lost my bestfriend.
The person who knew me, probably better than anyone.
The one person who could take me at my worst, and love me at my best.
He knew what to say, how to react.

And now that's gone.
We're strangers.
Tied together by something weird. awkward.
Something that you're just supposed to move on from; get over.

But I can't.
Not without Closure.